Just recently, I couldn’t even imagine that I would be so worried about the fact that my boyfriend didn’t call me for several hours. I thought that there should be freedom in a relationship, but now I understand that I don’t need any freedom, because I want to always be behind your back. I want you to protect me because that's how I feel the most confident in myself. My darling, I want to assure you that I will never leave you in my life because you are my soul mate. For me at the moment there is only one task - to make you the happiest person who will not worry or be nervous. Believe me, I really really want to make you happy, because it is with you that I am going to live my whole life, start a family and have children. You will be the most amazing husband and father, I have no doubt about it.

I can confidently say that I have the best man in this world, whom I love incredibly much. You appeared in mine a few years ago, and since then it seems to me that I am living in a fairy tale. You give me joy and happiness every day. Do you know what is the most pleasant thing for me? You give me flowers and gifts for no reason. I know that my girlfriends even envy me at times, because they see how tenderly you treat me. I want to say that there is no one dearer and closer to me, because I consider you my soul mate. It is important to me that you always feel like a happy, confident man. Soon you will become the head of the family, so there will be more responsibility, but I have no doubt that you will cope with your responsibilities. You will be just a wonderful father and husband.

My darling, my dearest and most beloved, I want to say that there is no one in this world dearer and closer to me. I remember the day when we were introduced to you. It was a truly fabulous day, because it seemed to me that at that moment something changed forever in my life. I found my feminine happiness together with one wonderful man. I will forever be grateful to fate that you and I met and became acquainted then. But we might not have even met, but simply passed each other by, but my beloved friend could not leave it just like that, but decided to work as a matchmaker. I want to say that I am trying my best to make you the happiest person in this world. Just know that I will always be there, because I only need you. We will have the best and strongest family. Love you!

I didn't think that happiness could be as beautiful as you. Yes, I believe that I have the most handsome and kind man in this world. I am incredibly lucky to have you because you tirelessly give me happiness and joy. I have never felt so confident in myself. Although I know that it will be even better next, because our relationship and our feelings are becoming stronger and brighter every day. I want to say that I will love you until my last breath, because you are the most precious thing I have. I never thought it was possible to love a person as much as I love you. Probably, there was simply no such person who would give me so much joy. You support me in everything, make me stronger, for which I am eternally grateful to you. I will do everything in my power to make you feel like the coolest person in this world. Believe that this is exactly what will happen.

I couldn’t even imagine that I had so many tender and bright feelings concentrated in me, but you showed me what love is. You taught me to appreciate every moment of this life, for which I am incredibly grateful to you. I want to say that for me there is no one dearer and closer, because I myself have never let anyone get close to me. But it didn’t work out that way with you, because I felt that you were my destiny. Usually when I heard such things, I always joked and said that it was nonsense. But I myself felt that I had found my man, whom I would never give to anyone again. I want to say that my love for you is endless, so you can be confident in me. I will not betray my man because I live for him. Know that my whole life belongs only to you. I would like to live at least two lives with you, dear!

My dear, I only regret one thing, that you and I have only one life. I would like to live with you for three hundred years in order to study you completely, in order to spend more time with you. You work constantly because you want to provide us with the best. But sometimes I wish that everything wasn’t so cool with us, but that we could spend a lot more time together. My darling, the most important thing for me is that you are always healthy, loved and happy, and I, in turn, will provide you with all this. I want to give you happiness, the brightest emotions, positive energy and lots and lots of joy. Believe me, I am trying solely for your sake, because you are the meaning of my life. I am sure that we will have the strongest and most friendly family, we will have the most beautiful children who will love their cool daddy more.

Until recently, I thought that I would never be able to be happy because I would not find my person. I constantly thought about it, and one day I just got desperate and gave up on everything. And that's when I met you. It was at that moment that I realized that I no longer needed to look for anyone, because I had found a person for whom I was ready to live and enjoy life. I want to thank you for every minute of happiness and joy, for every hour of love and simply for everything that you give me. I promise that I will do everything to make you feel happy and calm, not nervous or worried, because it harms you. I’m already trying to do everything so that you don’t get nervous, but believe me, I still have a lot of energy. I want you to always be calm, and we will have everything else. I see how you try, how you work, because you want to provide us with the best.

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We know for sure that a loved one deserves the best words in the world. But often we find ourselves in situations where it is difficult to correctly express what you feel.

website shares with you phrases that psychologists recommend saying to loved ones so that the relationship is strong as steel.

1. I understand

In a tense situation it is important adapt to the mood of the interlocutor. Sad? You can be a little sad together to let him know that you are on the same wavelength. Even in the most bleak monologue, you will find a couple of points with which you want to agree. And then you can move on to fun topics.

2. I like it!

We perceive the achieved result as only half the success. The second half is when the triumph is recognized by those around you and, most importantly, by your loved one. Only after approval we get complete satisfaction from achieving the goal, we feel successful and happy. But that’s exactly what you need, right?

3. What do you plan to do?

When people talk about a problem, they do not expect guidance, but rather emotional support. Instead of unsolicited advice, it is better to express your participation with a simple question: “What do you plan to do?”

4. You are so... caring / determined / brave

Compliments are a valuable “currency” that costs us nothing, but sets us up for success, inspires strength and gives support. It has been proven that the brain perceives compliments Also, as a monetary reward for the work done.

5. Maybe you should spend time with your friends today?

Everyone in a couple needs personal space. If your partner needs to be alone with himself, you should give him time to restored energy.

6. Do you remember how we...

7. What is your happiest childhood memory?

8. I'm sorry

It's normal to quarrel. The main thing is to return peace, leaving grievances in the past, because no one wants to live in a “combat” zone. In a quarrel there is no one person to blame, and the sooner one admits his part in the wrong, the higher the likelihood of waiting for a reciprocal apology.

9. Thank you

Psychologists note that gratitude is one of the most positive emotions. When a person feels that he is grateful for something, he tunes in do This is even better for the sake of the very fact of gratitude. Simply by thanking for something, we form the necessary feelings and intentions in our partner, in addition to his conscious control.

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Slide captions:

Analysis of the final test work by Gerasimov N.A. teacher of Russian language and literature

8. Identify the word in which the untestable unstressed vowel of the root is missing. t.. theoretician.. ripe meaning.. spoiled.. so caught.. lali (bed) Answer: Theorist

Identify the word in which the unstressed vowel of the root is missing, verified by stress. lost..matured..st wine..greet re..listical over..you'll break Answer: realistic

10. Write down the word in which the letter I is written in the blank space. .. uncontrolled.. completed.. dependent.. quivering (needle) stabbing.. stuttering.. sew

10. Write down the word in which the letter E is written in place of the gap. 11. Write down the word in which the letter E is written in place of the blank.

Determine the sentence in which NOT is spelled together with the word. The puppy, who had NOT yet LEARNED how to bark, whined pitifully. Ivan was a (NOT)DISTANT man, but extremely self-confident. Tatyana reacted to the latest news (NOT) JOYFULLY, as we expected, but with sadness and longing. (HAVING NOT MANAGED to take a proper rest from one job, the master immediately set to work on another. During excavations, archaeologists discovered (NOT) ANYTHING other than a food storage warehouse.

Determine the sentence in which NOT with the word is written COLLECTIVELY The boy, (NOT) NOTICED anything around, continued to build his sand castles. Lucy answered her father's questions incoherently, (IN)INTELLIGIBLY. Among the gloomy trees still (NOT) DRESSED with foliage, this bush with green leaves seemed like a miracle. Although the chick was (NOT) VERY strong, it was already trying to fly. It was not at all (UN)INTERESTING for me to listen to the same story again, so I wished everyone good night and went to my room.

Determine the sentence in which both highlighted words are written CONTINUOUSLY. Next year, the actress, beloved by the audience, plans to star in a CONTINUATION of the series, and ALSO in a new film by an Italian director. (DUE to) her age, my grandmother was used to not being surprised and therefore interpreted everything, WHATEVER happened, in her own way. (DURING) DURING the long winter, the living quarters on the shore of Lake Taimyr were heated with coal, which was (B) TWO carried by the winterers on dogs. (B) DUE to the severe drought that occurred in July, the river became shallow, (THUS) the pasture was moved to a distant lake. (C) TO THE RIGHT of the front door there was a large box with SOME tools.

Determine the sentence in which both highlighted words are written CONTINUOUSLY. (C) FOR three hours, Mishka and Borka argued heatedly about (WHY) the numbers were drawn on the telegraph poles and what they meant. The sun does not shine in the north, but BUD(TO) (C) EASILY shines through the translucent thick glass. It is difficult to explain (FROM) WHERE SOME habits come from. Levitan, just like Pushkin, Tyutchev and many others, was waiting for autumn - the most expensive and (PASS) FLIGHTING time of the year. At the tables, on which there were dozens of cutlery and containers (LIKE) jugs, only (AP) TWO sat down.

Indicate the number(s) in whose place(s) NN is written. The owners of the house were clearly in a hurry to leave their home: there were (1) left (2) things scattered everywhere, an overturned old (3) wicker (4) chest lay on the floor. Answer: _23____________________.

Indicate the number(s), in the place of which NN is written. Din was greeted by a happy (1) April day - with remnants of snow on the sides of the road, with cars covered in (2) road slush, with blue, in the ditch (3 ) in the clouds in the sky: an ordinary St. Petersburg April windy day (4). Answer: _____12______________________.

List two sentences that require ONE comma. 1) I left unnoticed and on the way I thought about little Sasha and his mother. 2) It began to get dark and soon Grandma Nastya appeared in the house and made us tea. 3) The river kept turning sharply in one direction and then in the other. 4) Mitka was not so much scared as he was discouraged and shocked by what happened. 5) We donated grandfather’s books and grandmother’s tablecloths and our porcelain set to the museum.

1) Through the open window one could hear the whistles of steam locomotives or the barking of dogs. 2) Misha did not hear the question or did not want to answer it. 3) Writers and journalists widely use proverbs and sayings in their works. 4) Aivazovsky’s brush was driven by an irrepressible desire to give the world new poems about the majestic struggle of man with the elements and about the unknown beauty of the radiant sea, about his native expanses and about distant coasts. 5) The spring turned out to be dry and warm and there were only occasional short rains.

Place punctuation marks. Indicate the number(s) in whose place(s) there should be a comma(s) in the sentence. We caught all the chicks (1) that fell out of the nest (2) and (3) placing a ladder (4) carefully put them back into the nest. Answer 1234

As soon as (1) the sun (3) rose above the horizon (2), breaking through the thick curtain of clouds (4), it pierced the sea waves with a golden radiance. Answer: ____34_______________________.

The catch (1) to the delight of everyone (2) was very rich; at times (3) it seemed (4) that the hook with bait barely had time to touch the water, and another fish was already shimmering on it. Answer: ___124_____________________

I (1) admit (2) I am always very nervous when I go on stage (3), however (4) I try to hide it carefully. Answer: 123

The letter (1) under the influence of (2) which (3) I was going to visit Marusya again (4) was long and disorderly. Answer 14

A large steamer (1) waiting (2) for which (3) the children had been crowding on the pier since early morning (4) moored to the shore to the sound of a loud whistle and enthusiastic cries of those who greeted it. Answer 14

As soon as all the urgent matters were completed (1) we met with Natasha in a small restaurant (2) and (3) while we were drinking coffee (4) Natasha told us (5) how to get to the publishing house. Answer: _____12345_________________

Vasily entered a crowded park (1) and (2) although he understood (3) that not everything in his life today was going smoothly (4) but today he wanted to smile (5) and think only about good things. Answer: ___134___________________________.

Which of the following statements are true? Please provide answer numbers. 1) Sentences 1–2 present the reasoning. 2) The content of sentence 3 is contrasted in meaning to the content of sentence 2. 3) Sentences 9–10 present a narrative. 4) Sentences 12–13 provide a description. 5) Sentences 5–6 present the reasoning.

Which of the following statements are true? 1) Sentence 3 is contrasted in meaning to sentence 2. 2) Sentences 5–6 present reasoning. 3) Sentences 9–11 present a narrative. 4) Sentences 12–13 provide a description. 5) Sentences 17–18 present the narrative.

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Text content of presentation slides: Analysis of the final test work Gerasimova N.A. teacher of Russian language and literature 8. Identify the word in which the untestable unstressed vowel of the root is missing. t..theoretician..reliable designation..past por..slza..lali (bed) Answer: Theorist Define a word in which the unstressed vowel of the root is missing, verified by stress. lost..grown..stvin..grete..leafy..you'll break Answer: realistic
10. Write down the word in which the letter I is written in the place of the gap. Write down the word in which the letter I is written in the blank space. the letter E is written. rushing around.. hated.. myAnswer: rushing about
Determine the sentence in which NOT is written together with the word. The puppy, who had not yet LEARNED how to bark, whined pitifully. Ivan was a (NOT) DISTANT person, but extremely self-confident. Tatyana reacted to the latest news (NOT) JOYFULLY, as we expected , but with sadness and melancholy. (HAVING NOT MANAGED to take a proper rest from one job, the master immediately set to work on another. During excavations, archaeologists discovered (NOT) SOMETHING other than a warehouse for storing food.style.color Define a sentence in which NOT with the word is spelled COLLECTIVELY. The boy, (NOT) NOTICED anything around, continued to build his sand castles. Lucy answered her father’s questions incoherently, (IN)INTELLIGENTLY. Among the gloomy trees, not yet (NOT) DRESSED with foliage, this bush with green leaves seemed like a miracle. At least the chick and (NOT) VERY strong, but was already trying to fly. I was not at all (NOT) INTERESTED in listening to the same story again, so I wished everyone good night and went to my room. Determine the sentence in which both highlighted words are written CONTINUOUSLY. Next year, the actress, beloved by the audience, plans to star in a CONTINUATION of the series, and ALSO in a new film by an Italian director. DUE to her age, the grandmother was used to not being surprised and therefore interpreted everything, WHATEVER happened, in her own way. (C) DURING the long winter, coal, which was (EACH) transported by winterers on dogs, was used to heat the living quarters on the shore of Lake Taimyr. (C) DUE to the severe drought that occurred in July, the river became shallow, (THUS) the pasture was moved to a distant lake .(C)to the right of the front door there was a large box with SOME tools. Determine the sentence in which both highlighted words are written CONTINUOUSLY. (B) FOR three hours, Mishka and Borka argued heatedly about (WHY) the numbers are drawn on the telegraph poles and what they mean. The sun doesn’t shine in the north, but WILL (THAT) (C) EASILY shines through the translucent thick glass. It is difficult to explain (FROM) WHERE SOME habits come from. Levitan, JUST like Pushkin, Tyutchev and many others, waited for autumn - the most expensive and (PASS) FLIGHTING time of the year .At the tables on which there were dozens of cutlery and containers (LIKE) jugs, only (EACH) TWO sat down. Indicate the number(s), in the place of which NN is written. The owners of the house were clearly in a hurry to leave their home: there were(1) things left scattered everywhere, there was an upside-down old(3) item on the floor(4) )th chest.Answer: _23__________________________.
Indicate the number(s), in the place of which NN is written. Din was greeted by a happy (1) April day - with remnants of snow on the sides of the road, with cars covered in (2) road slush, with blue, in the ditch (3 ) clouds in the sky: the usual St. Petersburg April windy (4) day. Answer: _____12______________________.
List two sentences that require ONE comma. 1) I left unnoticed and on the way I thought about little Sasha and his mother.2) It began to get dark and soon grandma Nastya appeared in the house and made us tea.3) The river kept turning sharply in one direction and then in the other.4) Mitka was not so much frightened as he was discouraged and shocked by what had happened. 5) We donated grandfather’s books and grandmother’s tablecloths and our porcelain set to the museum. 1) Through the open window, either the whistles of steam locomotives or the barking of dogs could be heard. 2) Misha did not hear the question or did not want to answer it. 3) Writers and journalists widely use proverbs and sayings in their works. 4) Aivazovsky’s brush was driven by an irrepressible desire to give the world new poems about the majestic struggle of man with the elements and about the unknown beauty of the radiant sea about native expanses and distant coasts.5) The spring turned out to be dry, warm and only occasionally short rains fell. Place punctuation marks. Indicate the number(s) in the place of which in the sentence there should be a comma(s). We caught all the chicks (1) that fell from the nest (2) and (3) by placing a ladder (4) carefully placed back in the nest. Answer 1234
As soon as (1) the sun rose above the horizon (2), breaking through the thick curtain of clouds (4), it pierced the sea waves with a golden glow. Answer: ____34_______________________.
The catch (1) to the delight of everyone (2) was very rich; at times (3) it seemed (4) that the baited hook barely had time to touch the water, and another fish was already shimmering on it. Answer: ___124_____________________
I (1) admit (2) I am always very nervous when I go on stage (3)however (4) I try to hide it carefully. Answer: 123
The letter (1) under the influence (2) of which (3) I was going to go visit Marusya again (4) was long and disorderly. Answer 14
A large steamer (1) in anticipation (2) of which (3) the children had been crowding on the pier since early morning (4) moored to the shore to the sound of a loud whistle and enthusiastic screams of those who greeted them. Answer 14
As soon as all the urgent matters were completed (1) we met with Natasha in a small restaurant (2) and (3) while we were drinking coffee (4) Natasha told us (5) how to get to the publishing house. Answer: _____12345_________________
Vasily entered a crowded park (1) and (2) although he understood (3) that not everything in his life today was going smoothly (4) but today he wanted to smile (5) and think only about good things. Answer: ___134________________________.
Which of the following statements are true? Indicate the answer numbers.1) Sentences 1–2 present a reasoning.2) The content of sentence 3 is contrasted in meaning to the content of sentence 2.3) Sentences 9–10 present a narrative.4) Sentences 12–13 present a description.5) Sentences 5–6 reasoning presented. Which of the following statements are true? 1) Sentence 3 is contrasted in meaning to sentence 2.2) Sentences 5–6 present reasoning. 3) Sentences 9–11 present narration. 4) Sentences 12–13 present description. 5) Sentences 17–18 present narration.

Attached files

In this article I will talk about how to stop being nervous. I will explain how to remain calm and cool in any life situation without the help of sedatives, alcohol and other things. I will talk not only about how to suppress states of nervousness and calm down, but I will also explain how you can stop being nervous in general, bring the body into a state in which this feeling simply cannot arise, in general, how to calm your mind and how to strengthen the nervous system.

The article will be structured in the form of sequential lessons and it is better to read them in order.

When do we get nervous?

Nervousness and jitters are that feeling of discomfort that you experience on the eve of important, responsible events and activities, during psychological stress and stress, in problematic life situations, and simply worry about all sorts of little things. It is important to understand that nervousness has how psychological so and physiological reasons and manifests itself accordingly. Physiologically, this is connected with the properties of our nervous system, and psychologically, with the characteristics of our personality: a tendency to worry, overestimation of the significance of certain events, a feeling of self-doubt and what is happening, shyness, worry about the result.

We begin to get nervous in situations that we consider either dangerous, threatening our lives, or for one reason or another significant or responsible. I think that a threat to life does not often loom before us, ordinary people. Therefore, I consider situations of the second type to be the main reason for nervousness in everyday life. Fear of failure, of looking inappropriate in front of people- all this makes us nervous. In relation to these fears, there is a certain psychological attunement; this has little to do with our physiology. Therefore, in order to stop being nervous, it is necessary not only to put the nervous system in order, but to understand and realize certain things, let’s start with understanding the nature of nervousness.

Lesson 1. The nature of nervousness. Necessary defense mechanism or hindrance?

Our palms begin to sweat, we may experience tremors, increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, confusion in our thoughts, it is difficult to gather ourselves, concentrate, it is difficult to sit still, we want to occupy our hands with something, smoke. These are the symptoms of nervousness. Now ask yourself, how much do they help you? Do they help cope with stressful situations? Are you better at negotiating, taking an exam, or communicating on a first date when you're on edge? The answer is, of course not, and what’s more, it can ruin the whole result.

Therefore, it is necessary to firmly understand that the tendency to be nervous is not a natural reaction of the body to a stressful situation or some ineradicable feature of your personality. Rather, it is simply a certain mental mechanism embedded in a system of habits and/or a consequence of problems with the nervous system. Stress is only your reaction to what is happening, and no matter what happens, you can always react to it in different ways! I assure you that the impact of stress can be minimized and nervousness eliminated. But why eliminate this? Because when you're nervous:

• Your thinking ability decreases and you have a harder time concentrating, which can make things worse and require your mental resources to be stretched to the limit.
• You have less control over your intonation, facial expressions, and gestures, which can have a bad effect on important negotiations or a date.
• Nervousness causes fatigue and tension to accumulate more quickly, which is bad for your health and well-being.
• If you are often nervous, this can lead to various diseases (however, a very significant part of diseases stem from problems of the nervous system)
• You worry about little things and therefore do not pay attention to the most important and valuable things in your life.
• You are prone to bad habits: alcohol, because you need to relieve stress with something

Remember all those situations when you were very nervous and this negatively affected the results of your actions. Surely everyone has many examples of how you broke down, unable to withstand psychological pressure, lost control and were deprived. So we will work with you on this.

Here is the first lesson, during which we learned that:

• Nervousness does not bring any benefit, but only hinders
• You can get rid of it by working on yourself
• In everyday life there are few real reasons to be nervous, since we or our loved ones are rarely threatened by anything, we mostly worry about trifles

I will return to the last point in the next lesson and, in more detail, at the end of the article and tell you why this is so.

You should configure yourself like this:

I have no reason to be nervous, it bothers me and I intend to get rid of it and this is real!

Don’t think that I’m just talking about something that I myself have no idea about. Throughout my childhood, and then my youth, until I was 24 years old, I experienced big pain. I couldn’t pull myself together in stressful situations, I worried about every little thing, I even almost fainted because of my sensitivity! This had a negative impact on health: pressure surges, “panic attacks,” dizziness, etc. began to be observed. Now all this is in the past.

Of course, I can’t say now that I have the best self-control in the world, but all the same, I stopped being nervous in those situations that make most people nervous, I became much calmer, compared to my previous state, I reached a fundamentally different level of self-control. Of course, I still have a lot to work on, but I’m on the right path and there is dynamics and progress, I know what to do.

In general, everything I’m talking about here is based solely on my experience of self-development, I’m not making anything up and I’m only talking about what helped me. So if I had not been such a painful, vulnerable and sensitive young man and, then, as a result of personal problems, I had not begun to remake myself - all this experience and the site that summarizes and structures it would not exist.

Lesson 2. How to stop being nervous about anything?

Think about all those events that make you nervous: your boss calls you, you take an exam, you expect an unpleasant conversation. Think about all these things, evaluate the degree of their importance for you, but not in isolation, but within the context of your life, your global plans and prospects. What is the significance of an altercation on public transport or on the road on a life-long scale, and is it really such a terrible thing to be late for work and be nervous about it?

Is this something to think about and worry about? At such moments, focus on the purpose of your life, think about the future, take a break from the current moment. I am sure that from this perspective, many things that you are nervous about will immediately lose their significance in your eyes, will turn into mere trifles, which they certainly are and, therefore, will not be worth your worries.

This psychological setting helps a lot stop being nervous about anything. But no matter how well we set ourselves up, although this will certainly have a positive effect, it will still not be enough, since the body, despite all the arguments of reason, can react in its own way. Therefore, let's move on and I will explain how to bring the body into a state of calm and relaxation immediately before any event, during and after it.

Lesson 3. Preparation. How to calm down before an important event.

Now some important event is inexorably approaching us, during which our intelligence, composure and will will be tested, and if we successfully pass this test, then fate will generously reward us, otherwise we will lose. This event could be a final interview for the job you dream of, important negotiations, a date, an exam, etc. In general, you have already learned the first two lessons and understand that nervousness can be stopped and this must be done so that this condition does not prevent you from focusing on the goal and achieving it.

And you realize that an important event awaits you ahead, but no matter how significant it is, even the worst outcome of such an event will not mean the end of your whole life for you: there is no need to dramatize and overestimate everything. It is precisely from the very importance of this event that the need to be calm and not worry arises. This is too important an event to let nervousness ruin it, so I will be collected and focused and will do everything for this!

Now we bring our thoughts to calm, relieve the jitters. First, immediately throw all thoughts of failure out of your head. In general, try to calm down the fuss and not think about anything. Free your head from thoughts, relax your body, exhale and inhale deeply. The simplest breathing exercises will help you relax.

Simple breathing exercises.

It should be done like this:

• inhale for 4 counts (or 4 pulse beats, you need to feel it first, it’s more convenient to do this on the neck, not on the wrist)
• keep the air in for 2 counts/hits
• exhale for 4 counts/beats
• do not breathe for 2 counts/beats and then inhale again for 4 counts/beats - all from the beginning

In short, as the doctor says: breathe - don’t breathe. 4 seconds inhale - 2 seconds hold - 4 seconds exhale - 2 seconds hold.

If you feel that your breathing allows you to take deeper inhalations/exhalations, then do the cycle not 4/2 seconds but 6/3 or 8/4 and so on.

You just need to breathe with your diaphragm, that is, with your stomach! During times of stress, we breathe rapidly from the chest, while diaphragmatic breathing calms the heartbeat, suppressing the physiological signs of nervousness, bringing you into a state of calm.

During the exercise, keep your attention only on your breathing! There should be no more thoughts! It is most important. And then after 3 minutes you will feel relaxed and calm. The exercise is done for no more than 5-7 minutes, according to how it feels. With regular practice, breathing practice not only helps you relax here and now, but also in general puts the nervous system in order and you are less nervous without any exercise. So I highly recommend it.

You can see my video on how to do diaphragmatic breathing correctly at the end of this article. In this video I talk about how to cope with panic using breathing. But this method will also allow you to get rid of nervousness, calm down and pull yourself together.

Other relaxation techniques are presented in my article.

Okay, so we are prepared. But the time for the event itself has already arrived. Next I will talk about how to behave during the event so as not to be nervous and to be calm and relaxed.

Lesson 4. How to avoid nervousness during an important meeting.

Pretend to be calm: even if neither your emotional mood nor breathing exercises helped you relieve tension, then at least try with all your might to demonstrate external calm and equanimity. And this is necessary not only to mislead your opponents about your current state. Expressing outer peace helps to achieve inner peace. This operates on the principle of feedback, not only how you feel determines your facial expressions, but also your facial expressions determine how you feel. This principle is easy to test: when you smile at someone, you feel better and more cheerful, even if you were in a bad mood before. I actively use this principle in my daily practice and this is not my invention, it is really a fact, it is even written about in Wikipedia in the article “emotions”. So the calmer you want to appear, the more relaxed you actually become.

Watch your facial expressions, gestures and intonation: The feedback principle obliges you to constantly look inside yourself and be aware of how you look from the outside. Do you seem too stressed? Are your eyes shifting? Are the movements smooth and measured or abrupt and impulsive? Does your face express cold impenetrability or can all your excitement be read on it? In accordance with the information about yourself received from your senses, you adjust all your body movements, voice, and facial expression. The fact that you have to take care of yourself in itself helps you get together and concentrate. And it’s not just that with the help of internal observation you control yourself. By observing yourself, you focus your thoughts on one point - on yourself, and do not let them get confused and lead you in the wrong direction. This is how concentration and calm are achieved.

Eliminate all markers of nervousness: What do you usually do when you're nervous? Are you fiddling with a ballpoint pen? Are you chewing on a pencil? Are you tying your left big toe and little toe into a knot? Now forget about it, keep your hands straight and don’t change their positions often. We don’t fidget in our chair, we don’t shift from foot to foot. We continue to look after ourselves.

Take your time: rush and bustle always sets a special nervous tone. Therefore, take your time even if you are late for a meeting. Since any rush very quickly disrupts composure and a calm mood. You begin to nervously rush from one to another, in the end you only provoke excitement. No matter how much you are rushed, do not rush, being late is not so scary, it is better to save your nerves. This applies not only to important meetings: try to get rid of haste in every aspect of your life: when you are getting ready for work, traveling in public transport, doing work. It's an illusion that when you rush, you achieve results faster. Yes, the speed increases, but only slightly, but you lose a lot in composure and concentration.

That's all. All these principles complement each other and can be summarized in the call “ watch yourself". The rest is specific and depends on the nature of the meeting itself. I would only advise you to think about each of your phrases, take your time with your answer, carefully weigh and analyze everything. There is no need to try to make an impression in all available ways, you will make one if you do everything right and don’t worry, work on the quality of your performance. There is no need to mumble and get lost if you are caught by surprise: calmly swallow, forget and move on.

Lesson 5. Calm down after the meeting.

Whatever the outcome of the event. You're on edge and still feeling stressed. It's better to take it off and think about something else. All the same principles apply here that helped you pull yourself together before the meeting itself. Try not to think too much about the past event: I mean all sorts of fruitless thoughts, what if I had performed this way and not that way, oh, how stupid I must have looked, oh I’m a fool, what if...! Just throw all thoughts out of your head, get rid of the subjunctive mood (if), everything has already passed, put your breathing in order and relax your body. That's all for this lesson.

Lesson 6. You shouldn’t create any reasons for nervousness at all.

This is a very important lesson. Typically, a significant factor in nervousness is the inadequacy of your preparation for the upcoming event. When you know everything and are confident in yourself, why should you worry about the result?

When I was studying at the institute, I missed a lot of lectures and seminars, went to the exams completely unprepared, hoping that I would pass and somehow pass. In the end, I passed, but only thanks to phenomenal luck or the kindness of the teachers. I often went for retakes. As a result, during the session I experienced such unprecedented psychological pressure every day due to the fact that I was trying to prepare in a hurry and somehow pass the exam.

During the sessions, an unrealistic number of nerve cells were destroyed. And I still felt sorry for myself, I thought so much had piled up, how hard it was, eh... Although it was all my fault, if I had done everything in advance (I didn’t have to go to lectures, but at least the material to prepare for the exam and pass I could provide myself with all the intermediate control tests - but then I was laziness and I was not at least somehow organized), then I would not have to be so nervous during the exams and worry about the result and about the fact that I would be drafted into the army if I I won’t hand over something, because I would be confident in my knowledge.

This is not a call not to miss lectures and study at institutes, I’m talking about the fact that you need to try yourself Do not create stress factors for yourself in the future! Think ahead and prepare for business and important meetings, do everything on time and don’t put it off until the last minute! Always have a ready-made plan in your head, or better yet several! This will save you a significant part of your nerve cells, and in general will contribute to great success in life. This is a very important and useful principle! Use it!

Lesson 7. How to strengthen the nervous system and how to stop getting nervous over trifles

In order to stop being nervous, it is not enough just to follow the lessons that I outlined above. It is also necessary to bring the body and mind into a state of peace. And the next thing I will tell you about will be those rules, following which you can strengthen your nervous system and experience less nervousness in general, be calmer and more relaxed. As a result of this you will understand how to stop being nervous over trifles. These methods are focused on long-term results; they will make you less susceptible to stress in general, and not only prepare you for a responsible event.

• Firstly, in order to correct the physiological factor of nervousness and bring the nervous system to a state of rest, you need to regularly. This is very good for calming the nervous system and calming the mind. I’ve written a lot about this, so I won’t dwell on it.
• Secondly, go in for sports () and take a set of health-supporting measures (contrast showers, healthy eating, vitamins, etc.). A healthy body has a healthy mind: your moral well-being depends not only on mental factors. Sports strengthens the nervous system.
• Walk more, spend time outdoors, try to sit in front of the computer less.
Diaphragmatic breathing during a panic attack